No one talks about the wave

 No one talks about the wave.

That sudden drop right before your milk lets down.
The tight chest.
The homesick feeling.
The random sadness that makes no sense.

You finally sit down to nurse your baby and instead of peace… it hits you.

A rush of dread.
Irritability.
Tears out of nowhere.

And then just as fast as it comes, it fades.

It’s called DMER.
Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex.

It’s hormonal.
It’s physical.
And it is not a reflection of how much you love your baby.

You are not ungrateful.
You are not broken.
You are not secretly regretting motherhood.

Your dopamine drops right before milk releases.
That’s it. That’s the science.

I wish someone had told me that weird emotional crash had a name.

Because suffering silently while holding the baby you prayed for is a confusing kind of guilt.

If this is you, please hear me.

You can love breastfeeding
and still feel that wave.

Both can exist at the same time.

And neither makes you a bad mom.