Just because it was normal in your childhood

 “Just because it was normal in your childhood doesn’t mean it was right.”

I’m not parenting to make anyone comfortable
Not my parents
Not my in-laws
Not strangers on the internet

I’m parenting to break cycles
To raise emotionally healthy kids
To teach them that love isn’t earned it’s given
That they can cry without being shamed
That they can say no and still be respected
That their feelings are safe with me

I was told to be quiet
To stop crying
To be good
To be tough
To say “yes ma’am” while swallowing the lump in my throat

And for a long time I believed that was love
That’s all I knew

But I know better now
So I’m doing better

That might look like gentle parenting to you
But to me it looks like freedom
Like healing
Like building a home where my child doesn’t have to recover from their childhood

So if my parenting makes you uncomfortable
That’s okay
It’s not meant for you
It’s meant for my child
And they are finally safe